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THE NOBLE SPANISH SOLDIER by THOMAS DEKKER |
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ACT 4 |
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ACT 4 SCENE 1 Enter
Medina, Alba,
[Carlo], and Daenia, met by Balthazar with a poniard and a pistol. BALTHAZAR You
met a Hydra. See, if one head fails Another
with a sulphurous beak stands yawning. What
hath raised up this devil? BALTHAZAR A
great man’s vices, that can raise all hell. What would you call that man, who
under-sail in a most goodly ship, wherein he ventures his life, fortunes, and
honours, yet in a fury should hew the mast down, cast sails overboard, fire all
the tacklings, and to crown this madness, should blow up all the decks, burn
th’oaken ribs, and in that combat ‘twix two elements leap desperately, and
drown himself in the seas? What were so brave a fellow? ALL A
brave black villain. BALTHAZAR That’s
I. All that brave black villain dwells in me, if I be that black villain. But I
am not! A nobler character prints out my brow, Whom
then? BALTHAZAR Basely
to stab a woman, your wronged niece and her most innocent son, Sebastian. ALBA The
boar now foams with wetting. DAENIA What
has blunted Thy
weapons point at these? BALTHAZAR My
honesty. A sign at which few dwell, pure honesty! I am a vassal to Of
whom? BALTHAZAR Of
King and Queen. With supple hams and an ill-boding look, I vowed to do it. Yet,
lest some choke-pear <32> of state policy should stop my throat, and spoil
my drinking pipe, see, like his cloak, I hung at the King’s elbow, till I had
got his hand to sign my life. [Balthazar
passes over the document signed by the King.] DAENIA
Shall
we see this and sleep? ALBA No,
whilst these wake. ‘Tis
the King’s hand? BALTHAZAR Think
you me a coiner <33>? No,
no, Thou
art thy self still, noble Balthazar. I
ever knew thee honest, and the mark Stands
still upon thy forehead. BALTHAZAR Else
flea the skin off. MEDINA I
ever knew thee valiant, and to scorn All
acts of baseness. I have seen this man Write
in the field such stories with his sword, That
our best chieftains swore there was in him As
‘twere a new philosophy of fighting, His
deeds were so punctilious. In one battle When
death so nearly missed my ribs, he struck Three
horses stone-dead under me. This man, Three
times that day, even through the jaws of danger, Redeemed
me up and, I shall print it ever, Stood
over my body with Colossus thighs Whilst
all the thunder-bolts which war could throw, Fell
on his head. And Balthazar, thou canst not Be
now but honest still, and valiant still, Not
to kill boys and women. BALTHAZAR My
biter here, eats no such meat.
Good
fellow-soldier aid him, and stay, mark, Give
this false fire to the believing King, That
the child’s sent to heaven, but that the mother Stands
rocked so strong with friends, ten thousand billows Cannot
once shake her. BALTHAZAR This
I’ll do. MEDINA Away. Yet
one word more. Your counsel, Noble friends. Hark
Balthazar, because nor eyes nor tongues, Shall
by loud larums, that the poor boy lives, Question
thy false report, the child shall, closely Mantled
in darkness, forthwith be conveyed To
the monastery of ALL Good. MEDINA Despatch
then, be quick. BALTHAZAR As
lightning. Exit
Balthazar. ALBA This
fellow is some angel dropped from heaven
MEDINA
He
is a wheel Of
swift and turbulent motion. I have trusted him, Yet
will not hang on him too many plummets, Lest
with a headlong gyre <34> he ruins all. In
these state consternations, when a kingdom Stands
tottering at the centre, out of suspicion Safety
grows often. Let us suspect this fellow, And
that albeit he show us the King’s hand, It
may be but a trick. DAENIA Your
Lordship hits A
poisoned nail i’th head. This waxen fellow, By
the King’s hand so bribing him with gold, Is
set on screws, perhaps is made his creature, To
turn round every way.
MEDINA
Out
of that fear Will
I beget truth. For myself in person Will
sound the King’s breast. CARLO How?
Yourself in person? ALBA That’s
half the prize he gapes for.
MEDINA
I’ll
venture it, And
come off well I warrant you, and rip up His
very entrails, cut in two his heart, And
search each corner in’t, yet shall not he Know
who it is cut up the anatomy. DAENIA ‘Tis
an exploit worth wonder. CARLO Put
the worst, Say
some infernal voice should roar from hell, The
infant’s cloistering up. ALBA ‘Tis
not our danger, Nor
the imprisoned Prince’s, for what thief Dares
by base sacrilege rob the Church of him? CARLO At
worst none can be lost but this slight fellow!
MEDINA
All
build on this as on a stable cube. If
we our footing keep, we fetch him forth, And
crown him King. If up we fly i’th air, We
for his soul’s health a broad way prepare. DAENIS They
come. Enter
Balthazar and Sebastian.
MEDINA
Thou
knowest where to bestow him, Balthazar. BALTHAZAR Come
noble boy. ALBA Hide
him from being discovered. BALTHAZAR Discovered?
Would there stood a troop of Moors thrusting the paws of hungry lions forth, to
seize this prey, and this but in my hand, I should do something. SEBASTIAN Must
I go with this black fellow, Uncle?
MEDINA
Yes,
pretty coz, hence with him Balthazar. BALTHAZAR Sweet
child, within few minutes I’ll change thy fate And
take thee hence, but set thee at heavens gate. [Exit
Balthazar and Sebastian.]
MEDINA
Some
keep aloof and watch this soldier CARLO I’ll
do’t. Exit
Carlo. DAENIA What’s
to be done now?
MEDINA
First
to plant strong guard About
the mother, then into some snare To
hunt this spotted panther, and there kill him. DAENIA What
snares have we can hold him?
MEDINA
Be
that care mine. Dangers,
like stars, in dark attempts best shine. Exeunt. ACT 4 SCENE 2 Enter
Cornego, Balthazar. CORNEGO The
Lady Onaelia dresseth the stead of her commendations in the most courtly attire
that words can be clothed with, from herself to you, by me. BALTHAZAR So
Sir, and what disease troubles her now? CORNEGO The
King’s evil. And here she hath sent something to you, wrapped up in a white
sheet, you need not fear to open it, ‘tis no course. BALTHAZAR What’s
here? A letter minced into five morsels? What was she doing when thou camest
from her? CORNEGO At
her prick-song. BALTHAZAR So
me thinks, for here’s nothing but sol-re-me-fa-mi. What crotchet fills her
head now, canst tell? CORNEGO No
crotchets, ‘tis only the Cliff has made her mad. BALTHAZAR What
instrument played she upon? CORNEGO A
wind instrument, she did nothing but sigh. BALTHAZAR Sol,
re, me, fa, mi. CORNEGO My
wit has always a singing head, I have found out her note captain. BALTHAZAR The
tune? Come. CORNEGO Sol,
my soul. Re, is all rent and torn like a ragamuffin. Me, mend it good captain.
Fa, fa. What’s fa Captain? BALTHAZAR Fa,
why farewell and be hanged. CORNEGO Mi
Captain, with all my heart. Have I tickled my Lady’s fiddle well? BALTHAZAR Oh,
but you stick wants rosin <35> to make the strings sound clearly. No, this
double virginal, being cunningly touched, another matter of jack leaps up then
is now in mine eye. Sol, re me fa, mi, I have it now. Solus Rex me facit miseram
<36>. Alas poor Lady, tell her no apothecary in CORNEGO Assa
foetida? What’s that? BALTHAZARA
A
thing to be taken in a glister-pipe <38>. CORNEGO Why,
what ails my Lady? BALTHAZAR What
ails she? Why when she cries out, Solus Rex me facit miseram, she says in the
Hypocronicall <39> language, that she is so miserably tormented with the
wind colic that it racks her very soul. CORNEGO I
said somewhat cut her soul in pieces. BALTHAZAR But
go to her, and say the oven is heating. CORNEGO And
what shall be baked in’t? BALTHAZAR Carp pies.<40> And besides, tell her the hole in her coat shall be mended, and tell her if the dial of good days <41> goes true, why then bounce buckrum.<42> CORNEGO The
devil lies sick of the mulligrubs.<43> BALTHAZAR Or
the Cony is dub’d, and three sheepskins ... CORNEGO With
the wrong side outward ... BALTHAZAR Shall
make the fox a night-cap. CORNEGO So
the goose talks French to the buzzard. BALTHAZAR But,
Sir, if evil days jostle our prognostication to the wall, then say there’s a
fire in a whore-masters cod-piece. CORNEGO And
a poisoned bag-pudding in Tom Thumb’s belly. BALTHAZAR The
first cut be thine. Farewell. CORNEGO Is
this all? BALTHAZAR Would’st
not trust an Almanac? CORNEGO Not
a coranta <44> neither, though it were sealed with butter,
<45> and
yet I know where they both lie passing well. Enter
Lopez. LOPEZ The
King sends round about the court to seek you. BALTHAZAR Away
Otterhound. CORNEGO Dancing
bear, I’m gone. Exit
Cornego. Enter King attended. KING A
Private room, Exeunt,
King and Balthazar remain I’st
done? Hast drawn thy two-edged sword out yet? BALTHAZAR No,
I was striking at the two iron bars that hinder your passage, and see Sir. Draws. KING What
mean'st thou? BALTHAZAR The
edge abated, feel. KING No,
no I see it. BALTHAZAR As
blunt as ignorance. KING How?
Put up - so - how? BALTHAZAR I
saw by chance hanging in Cardinal Alvarez gallery, a picture of hell. KING So
what of that? BALTHAZAR There
lay upon burnt straw ten thousand brave fellows all stark naked, some leaning
upon crowns, some on Mitres, some on bags of gold. Glory, in another corner lay,
a feather beaten in the rain. Beauty was turned into a watching candle that went
out stinking. Ambition went upon a huge high pair of stilts but horribly rotten.
Some in another nook were killing Kings, and some having their elbows shoved
forward by Kings to murder others. I was, me thought, half in hell myself whist
I stood to view this piece. KING Was
this all? BALTHAZAR Was’t
not enough to see that a man is more healthful that eats dirty puddings, than he
that feeds on a corrupted conscience? KING Conscience!
What’s that? A conjuring book ne’r opened Without
the reader’s danger. ‘Tis indeed A
scarecrow set i’th world to frighten weak fools. Hast
thou seen fields paved o’er with carcasses, Now
to be tender-footed, not to tread On
a boy's mangled quarters, and a woman's! BALTHAZAR Nay,
Sir, I have searched the records of the Low-Countries, and find that by your
pardon I need not care a pin for goblins, and therefore I will do it Sir. I did
recoil because I was double charged. KING No
more. Here comes a satyr with sharp horns. Enter
Cardinal, and Medina
like a
French Doctor. CARDINAL Sir,
here’s a Frenchman charged with some strange business Which
to close ear only he’ll deliver, Or
else to none. KING A
Frenchman?
MEDINA
Oui,
Monsieur. KING Cannot
he speak the Spanish?
MEDINA
Si
Signor, un Poco - Monsieur Acontez in de Corner, me come for offer to your Bon
Grace mi trezhumbla service, by gar no John fidleco shall put into your near
braver melody dan dis un petite pipe shall play to your great bon Grace. KING What
is the tune you strike up, touch the string.
MEDINA
Dis
- me has run up and down mine Country and learn many fine thing, and mush
knavery, now more and all dis me know you’ll jumbla de fine vench and fill her
belly with garsoone, her name is La Madam ... KING Onaelia. She
by gar. Now Monsieur dis Madam send for me to help her malady, being very naught
of her corpus, her body, me know you no point loves dis vench. But royal
Monsieur donne moye ten thousand French Crowns she shall kick up her tail by
gar, and beshide lie dead as dog in de shannell. KING Speak
low.
MEDINA
As
de bag-pipe when de wind is puff, Gar beigh, KING Thou
namest ten thousand Crowns, I’ll treble them Rid
me of this leprosy. Thy name? MEDINA KING Shall
I a second wheel add to this mischief To
set it faster going? If one break, T’other
may keep his motion. MEDINA Esselent
fort boone. KING Balthazar. To
give thy sword an edge again, this Frenchman Shall
whet thee on, that if thy pistol fail, Or
poniard, this can send the poison home. BALTHAZAR Brother
Cain we’ll shake hands.
MEDINA
In
de bowl of de bloody busher. ‘Tis very fine wholesome. KING And
more to arm your resolution, I’ll
tune this Churchman so, that he shall chime In
sounds harmonious, merit to that man Whose
hand has but a finger in that act. BALTHAZAR That
music were worth hearing. KING Holy
father, You
must give pardon to me in unlocking A
cave stuffed full with serpents, which my State Threaten
to poison, and it lies in you To
break their bed with thunder of your voice. CARDINAL How
princely son? KING Suppose
a universal Hot
pestilence beat her mortiferous wings O’er
all my kingdoms, am I not bound in soul, To
empty all our academies of doctors And
Aesculapian <46> spirits to charm this plague? CARDINAL You
are. KING Or
had the canon made a breach Into
our rich Escurial <47>, down to beat it About
our ears, should I stop this breach Spare
even our richest Ornaments, nay our crown, Could
it keep bullets off. CARDINAL No
sir, you should not. KING This
linstock <48> gives you fire. Shall then that strumpet And
bastard breathe quick vengeance in my face, Making
my Kingdom reel, my subjects stagger In
their obedience, and yet live? CARDINAL How?
Live! Shed
not their bloods to gain a kingdom greater Than
ten times this.
MEDINA
Pish,
not matter how Red-cap and his wit run. KING As
I am Catholic King, I’ll have their hearts Panting
in these two hands. CARDINAL Dare
you turn hangman? Is
this religion Catholic to kill What
even brute beasts abhor to do, your own! To
cut in sunder wedlock’s sacred knot Tied
by heaven’s fingers! To make Spain a
bonfire To
quench which must a second deluge rain In
showers of blood, no water. If you do this There
is an arm armipotent that can fling you Into
a base grave, and your palaces With
lightening strike, and of their ruins make A
tomb for you, unpitied and abhorred, Bear
witness all you lamps celestial I
wash my hands of this. KING Rise
my good angel, Whose
holy tunes beat from me that evil spirit Which
jogs mine elbow, hence thou dog of hell.
MEDINA
Bow
wow. KING Bark
out no more thou mastiff, get you all gone, And
let my soul sleep. [Aside to Balthazar] There’s gold, peace, see it done. Exit
King. BALTHAZAR Sirra,
you salsa-perilla <49>, rascal, toads-gut, you whorson pockey French spawn
of a butsten-bellyed spider. Do you hear Monsieur?
MEDINA
Why
do you bark and snap at my Narcissus, as if I were de French dog? BALTHAZAR You
cur of Cerberus litter, [Strikes
him] You’ll
poison the honest Lady? Do but once toot <50> into her chamber-pot, and
I’ll make thee look worse than a witch does upon a close stool. CARDINAL You
shall not dare to touch him, stood he here Single
before thee. BALTHAZAR I’ll
cut the rat into anchovies. CARDINAL I’ll
make thee kiss his hand, embrace him, love him And
call him ... BALTHAZAR The
perfection of all Spaniards, Mars in little, the best book of the art of war
printed in these times. As a French doctor, I would have given you pellets for
pills, but as my noblest Lord, rip my heart out in your service.
MEDINA
Thou
are the truest Clock That
e’er to time paidst tribute, honest soldier, |