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THE NOBLE SPANISH SOLDIER by THOMAS DEKKER |
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ACT 2 |
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Enter
Balthazar, [having been] slighted by the Dons. BALTHAZAR Thou
god of good apparel, what strange fellows are bound to do thee honour.
Mercer’s <12> books show men’s devotions to thee. Heaven cannot hold a
saint so stately. Do not my dons know me because I’m poor in clothes? Stood my
beaten tailor plaiting my rich hose, my silk stocking man drawing upon my
Lordship’s courtly calf pairs of imbroidered things, whose golden clocks
strike deeper to the faithful shop-keeper’s heart, than into mine to pay him.
Had my barber perfumed my lousy thatch here and poked out me tusks more stiff
than are a cats muschatoes <13>, these pied-winged butterflies had known
me then. Another fly-boat! <14> Save thee illustrious Don. Enter
Don Rodrigo. Sir,
is the King at leisure to speak Spanish with a poor Soldier? RODRIGO No BALTHAZAR No,
Sirah, you, no! You Don with the ochre face, I wish to have thee Enter
Cockadillio. Signor,
is the King at leisure? COCKADILLO To
do what? BALTHAZAR To
hear a soldier speak. COCKADILLO I
am no ear picker To
sound his hearing that way. BALTHAZAR Are
you of court sir? COCKADILLO Yes,
the King’s barber. BALTHAZAR That’s
his ear picker. Your name, I pray. COCKADILLO Don
Cockadillio If,
soldier, thou hast suits to beg at court, I
shall descend so low as to betray Thy
paper to the hand Royal. BALTHAZAR I
beg, you whorson muscod <16>! My petition is written on my bosom in red
wounds. COCKADILLO I
am no barber-surgeon. Exit
Cockadillio. BALTHAZAR You
yellowhammer, why, shaver: that such poor things as these, only made up of
tailor's shreds and merchant's silken rags and 'pothecary drugs to lend their
breath sophisticated smells, when their rank guts stink worse than cowards in
the heat of battle. Such whaleboned-doublet rascals, that owe more to
laundresses and seamsters for laced linen than all their race from their great
grand-father to this their reign, in clothes were ever worth. These
excrements of silk worms! Oh that such flies do buzz about the beams of Majesty,
like earwigs tickling a King’s yielding ear with that court-organ, flattery,
when a soldier must not come near the court gates twenty score, but stand for
want of clothes, though he win towns, amongst the almsbasket-men! His best
reward being scorned to be a fellow to the blackguard. Why should a soldier,
being the world’s right arm, be cut thus by the left, a courtier? Is the world
all ruff and feather and nothing else? Shall I never see a tailor give his coat
with a difference from a gentleman? Enter
King, Alanzo, Carlo, Cockadillio. KING Let
us make haste to meet thee. How art thou altered? Do
you not know him? ALANZO Employed
against the Moors KING
Half
turned Moor! I’ll
honour thee, reach him a chair, that table And
now, Aeneas-like, let thine own trumpet Sound
forth thy battle with those slavish Moors. BALTHAZAR My
music is a Cannon, a pitched field my stage, Furies the actors, blood and
vengeance the scene, death the story, a sword imbrued with blood, the pen that
writes, and the poet a terrible buskined <17> tragical fellow, with a
wreath about his head of burning match instead of bays. KING On
to the battle. BALTHAZAR ‘Tis
here without bloodshed. This our main battalia, that the van, this the vaw
<18>, these the wings, here we fight, there they fly, here they insconce
<19>, and here our sconces <20> lay seventeen moons on the cold
earth. KING Must
have his music too. Describe the battle. BALTHAZAR The
battle? Am I come from doing to talking? The hardest part for a soldier to play
is to prate well. Our tongues are fifes, drums, petronels <21>, muskets,
culverin <22> and cannon. These are our roarers, the clocks which we go by
are our hands. Thus we reckon ten, our swords strike eleven and when steel
targets of proof clatter one against another, then ‘tis KING So. BALTHAZAR To
that heat we came, our drums beat, pikes were shaken and shivered, swords and
targets clashed and clattered, muskets rattled cannons roared, men died
groaning, brave laced jerkings and feathers looked pale, tottered rascals fought
pell mell. Here fell a wing, there heads were tossed like footballs, legs and
arms quarrelled in the air and yet lay quietly on the earth. Horses trampled
upon heaps of carcasses, troops of carbines tumbled wounded from their horses,
we besiege Moors and famine us, mutinies bluster and are calm. I vowed not to
doff mine armour though my flesh were frozen to it and turn into iron, nor to
cut head nor beard till they yielded. My hairs and oath are of one length for,
with Caesar, thus write I mine own story: veni, vidi, vici. KING A
pitched field, quickly fought. Our hand is thine, And
because thou shalt not murmur that thy blood Was
lavished forth for an ungrateful man, Demand
what we can give thee and ‘tis thine. BALTHAZAR Only
your love. KING ‘Tis
thine, rise soldier’s best accord When
wounds of wrong are healed up by the sword. Onaelia
knocks loudly at the door. ONAELIA Let
me come in, I’ll kill the treacherous King, The
murderer of mine honour, let me come in. KING What
woman’s voice is that? ALL KING Bar
out that fiend. ONAELIA I’ll
tear him with my nails, Let
me come in, let me come in, help, help me. KING Keep
her from following me. A guard. ALANZO They
are ready, sir. KING Let
a quick summons call our Lords together, This
disease kills me. BALTHAZAR Sir,
I would be private with you. KING Forebear
us, but see the doors are well guarded. Exeunt
[King and Balthazar remain]. BALTHAZAR Will
you, Sir, promise to give me freedom of speech? KING Yes,
I will, take it, speak any thing, ‘tis pardoned. BALTHAZAR You
are a whoremaster. Do you send me to win towns for you abroad and you lose a
kingdom at home? KING What
kingdom? BALTHAZAR The
fairest in the world, the kingdom of your fame, your honour. KING Wherein? BALTHAZAR I’ll
be plain with you. Much mischief is done by the mouth of a cannon, but the fire
begins at a little touch-hole. You heard what nightingale sung to you even now. KING Ha,
ha, ha! BALTHAZAR Angels
erred but once and fell, but you Sir, spit in heaven’s face every minute and
laugh at it. Laugh still, follow your courses, do. Let your vices run like your
kennels of hounds, yelping after you till they pluck down the fairest head in
the herd, everlasting bliss. KING Any
more? BALTHAZAR Take
sin as the English snuff tobacco, and scornfully blow the smoke in the eyes of
heaven, the vapour flies up in clouds of bravery. But when ‘tis out, the coal
is black, your conscience, and the pipe stinks. A sea of rosewater cannot
sweeten your corrupted bosom. KING Nay,
spit thy venom. BALTHAZAR ‘Tis
Aqua Coelestis <23>, no venom. For when you shall clasp up these two
books, never to be opened again, when by letting fall that anchor which can
never more be weighed up, your mortal navigation ends. Then there’s no playing
at spurn-point <24> with thunderbolts. A vintner then for unconscionable
reckoning or a tailor for unmeasurable items shall not answer in half that fear
you must. KING No
more. BALTHAZAR I
will follow truth at the heels, though her foot beat my gums in pieces. KING The
barber that draws out a lion’s tooth Curseth
his trade; and so shalt thou. BALTHAZAR I
care not. KING Because
you have beaten a few base-born moors, Me
think’st thou to chastise? What is past I pardon, Because
I made the key to unlock thy railing; But
if thou dar’st once more be so untuned I’ll
sent thee to the galleys. Who are without there, How
now? Enter
[guards and attendants] drawn. ALL In
danger, Sir? KING Yes,
yes, I am, but ‘tis no point of weapon Can
rescue me. Go presently and summon All
our chief Grandees, Cardinals, and Lords Of
We
called you forth to execute a business Of
another strain - but ‘tis no matter now. Thou
diest when next thou furrowest up our brow. BALTHAZAR So,
die! Exit
Balthazar, enter Cardinal, Rodrigo, Alba, Daenia, Valasco. KING I
find my sceptre shaken by enchantments Charactered
in this parchment, which to unloose, I’ll
practice only counter-charms of fire, And
blow the spells of lightening into smoke: Fetch
burning tapers. [Exit
attendant who returns with light.] CARDINAL Give
me audience, Sir. My
apprehension opens me a way To
a close fatal mischief, worse than this You
strive to murder. Oh, this act of yours Alone
shall give your dangers life, which else Can
never grow to height. Do, Sir, but read A
book here closed up, which too late you opened, Now
blotted by you with foul marginal notes. KING Art
frantic? CARDINAL You
are so, Sir. KING If
I be, Then
here’s my first mad fit. CARDINAL For
honour’s sake, For
love you bear to conscience - KING Reach
the flames: Grandees
and Lords of Spain be witness all What
here I cancel. Read, do you know this bond? ALL Our
hands are to it. DAENIA ‘Tis
your confirmed contract With
my sad kinswoman: but wherefore Sir, Now
is your rage on fire, in such a presence To
have it mourn in ashes? KING Marquis
Daenia We’ll
lend that tongue, when this no more can speak. CARDINAL Dear
Sir! KING I
am deaf, Played
the full concert of the spheres unto me Upon
their loudest strings - so burn that witch Who
would dry up the tree of all But
that I purge her sorceries by fire. [Burns
contract.] Troy
lies in
cinders. Let your Oracles Now
laugh at me if I have been deceived By
their ridiculous riddles. Why, good father, Now
you may freely chide, why was your zeal Ready
to burst in showers to quench our fury? CARDINAL Fury
indeed, you give it proper name. What
have you done? Closed up a festering wound Which
rots the heart. Like a bad surgeon, Labouring
to pluck out from your eye a mote, You
thrust the eye clean out. KING Th’art
mad ex tempore: What
eye? Which is that wound? CARDINAL That
scroll, which now You
make the black indenture of your lust Although
eat up in flames, is printed here, In
me, in him, in these, in all that saw it, In
all that ever did but hear ‘twas yours. The
scold of the whole world, fame, will anon Rail
with her thousand tongues at this poor shift Which
gives your sin a flame greater than that You
lend the paper. You to quench a wild fire, Cast
Oil upon it. KING Oil
to blood shall turn, I’ll
lose a limb before the heart shall mourn. Exeunt,
Daenia and Alba remain. DAENIA He’s
mad with rage or joy. ALBA With
both; with rage To
see his follies checked, with fruitless joy Because
he hopes his contract is cut off, Which
divine justice more exemplifies. Enter
Medina. MEDINA Where’s
the King? DAENIA Wrapped
up in clouds of lightning. What
has he done? Saw you the contract torn? As
I did here a minion swear he threatened. ALBA He
tore it not, but burned it. Openly! DAENIA And
heaven with us to witness. Well,
that fire Will
prove a catching flame to burn his kingdom. ALBA Meet
and consult. No
more, trust not the air With
our projections, let us all revenge Wrongs
done to our most noble kinswoman. Action
is honours language, swords are tongues, Which
both speak best, and best do right our wrongs. Exeunt.
ACT
2 SCENE 2 Enter
Onaelia from one way, Cornego another. CORNEGO Madam,
there’s a bear without to speak with you ONAELIA A
bear? CORNEGO It’s
a man all hair, and that’s as bad. ONAELIA Who
is it? CORNEGO ‘Tis
one Master Captain Balthazar. ONAELIA I
do not know that Balthazar. CORNEGO He
desires to see you: and if you love a water-spaniel before he be shorn, see him. ONAELIA Let
him come in. Enter
Balthazar. CORNEGO Hist;
a duck, a duck. There she is, Sir. BALTHAZAR A
soldier’s good wish bless you lady. ONAELIA Good
wishes are most welcome Sir, to me, So
many bad ones blast me. BALTHAZAR Do
you not know me? ONAELIA I
scarce know myself. BALTHAZAR I
have been at tennis Madam, with the king. I gave him fifteen and all his faults,
which is much, and now I come to toss a ball with you. ONAELIA I
am bandied too much up and down already. CORNEGO Yes,
she has been struck under line, master soldier. BALTHAZAR I
conceit you, dare you trust yourself alone with me? ONAELIA I
have been laden with such weights of wrong That
heavier cannot press me. Hence Cornego. CORNEGO Hence
Cornego? Stay Captain? When man and woman are put together, Some egg of villainy
is sure to be sat upon. Exit
Cornego. BALTHAZAR What
would you say to him should kill this man that hath you so dishonoured? ONAELIA Oh,
I would Crown him With
thanks, praise, gold and tender of my life. BALTHAZAR Shall
I be that German fencer, and beat all the knocking boys before me? Shall I kill
him? ONAELIA There’s
music in the tongue that dares but speak it. BALTHAZAR That
fiddle then is in me, this arm can do it, by poniard, poison or pistol: but
shall I do it indeed? ONAELIA One
step to human bliss is sweet revenge. BALTHAZAR Stay.
What made you love him? ONAELIA His
most goodly shape Married
to royal virtues of his mind. BALTHAZAR Yet
now you would divorce all that goodness; and why? For a little lechery of
revenge? It’s a lie. The burr that sticks in your throat is a throne. Let him
out of his mess of kingdoms cut out but one, and lay Sicily, ONAELIA Monster
of men thou are, thou bloody villain, Traitor
to him who never injured thee. Dost
thou profess arms, and art bound in honour To
stand up like a brazen wall to guard Thy
king and country, and would’st thou ruin both? BALTHAZAR You
spur me on to it. ONAELIA True; Worse
am I then the horridest fiend in hell To
murder him who I once loved too well: For
thou I could run mad, and tear my hair, And
kill that godless man that turned me vile, Though
I am cheated by a purjurious Prince Who
has done wickedness, at which even heaven Shakes
when the sun beholds it, O yet I’d rather Ten
thousand poisoned poniards stab my breast Than
one should touch his. Bloody slave! I’ll play Myself
the hangman, and will butcher thee If
thou but prickest his finger. BALTHAZAR Sayest
thou me so! Give me thy goll <27>, thou are a noble girl. I did play the
Devil’s part, and roar in a feigned voice, but I am the honestest Devil that
ever spat fire. I would not drink that infernal draft of a King’s blood, to go
reeling to damnation, for the weight of the world in diamonds. ONAELIA Art
thou not counterfeit? BALTHAZAR Now
by my scars I am not. ONAELIA I’ll
call thee honest soldier then, and woo thee To
be an often visitant. BALTHAZAR Your
servant, Yet
must I be a stone upon a hill, For
thou I do no good, I’ll not lie still. Exeunt.
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